TwiddlyBits' Sex Blog

• Matisse is beautiful, witty, intelligent and charming. Her voice is confident & she carries herself such that you know that she knows who she is and what she wants from life. You get the impression that if you cross her she will cut you down quickly and neatly and you will not get back up again, yet she has a quick smile that lights up her face.

I didn't think I needed to say those things simply because there's no new information there - all of that is self-evident to anyone who has read her blog. I read her blog every day, even if I don't really have time to. She has opened my eyes to many things about sex work that never would have occured to me otherwise and has done so in a way that was fun to read. I sincerely respect her.

Is that an insult?

• As for Max, as far as I know, he does not keep a blog, so everything I know about him I have learned from his website, Matisse's blog, Monk's blog & what Monk told me about him when Monk was here in June. I know that both Matisse and Monk hold Max in *extremely* high regard and I have no reason to do otherwise. I cannot report on his voice or his smile or his eyes simply because I was never face-to-face with the man. I can tell you that the image in my mind's eye of him was this:

Max is Evil Personifed. He is Dark and Mysterious. The Aura of Evil eminating from him is so palpable that light bulbs dim when he enters a room and strains of "O Fortuna" are heard in the distance. Birds stop singing when he is around, cowering in fear. A single glare from his eyes would stop your heart stone cold dead in your chest.

When I actually saw the man, what I thought was:

Oh. He looks *normal*! YAY!

You see, I went there with the attitude "there is no way in hell that I would ever EVER want Max to tie me up, he frightens me far too much". But by the time I left - after having observed him suspending 3 or 4 very willing and happy participants - my attitude was more along the lines of "Max seems to be sensitive and caring. Maybe it would be FUN to be tied up by him. I wonder if that could ever be arranged?" The very "normalcy" of his appearance comforted me.

Is that an insult?

• I am not complex. I am not multi-layered or multi-faceted. My online persona is very close to my IRL persona. I am a "WYSIWYG" girl. This is by choice. I spent too many years hiding my feelings and thoughts and have chosen to be upfront and transparent. I say what I mean and I mean what I say. There is no duplicity or prevarication or dissembling here. I believe in open and honest communication. The purpose of language is to impart information; lying perverts language and I prefer to have as little to do with that as possible. On those extremely rare ocassions I feel the need to insult someone (and someone has to push me pretty damn far before I feel the need), it is not "thinly veiled" - I'm not that subtle. My insults are not rapiers or stilleti, they are two-by-fours with nails. The insulted party - and all observers, even the most clueless - are left without a shadow of a doubt as to what I meant.

Therefore, if you read something here and either aren't sure what I meant by it or feel that someone may find it to be a "thinly veiled insult", then by all means tell me. It is most likely that my language skills have simply failed me and further clarification on my part is needed. Please do not go around behind my back saying things like "OMG! She insulted so-and-so!". This isn't Junior High; we are supposed to be adults. If you have a problem with something I wrote, tell *me*.

• I can't force you to believe me and I certainly will not beg. I have done all I can do - I have stated my side of things in the hope that you will recognize truth when you see it. If you choose to ignore that truth, there is nothing I can do about that. I will mourn the loss of our friendship all the more because it was broken by a mis-understanding and mis-interpretation.

I just got an email from someone asking me why I had chosen to "speak so poorly of Max and Matisse".

WTF?

Max & Matisse -- please know that it was NOT my intention to "speak poorly" about either of you!! If it came across that way, I most humbly apologize!

Like I said, I only got to talk to Matisse a few times through the night - just snippets of conversation here & there, as she was busy being Assistant Host (her words!) & had other duties to attend to.

I didn't get to talk to Max at all that night, but I said in my post that I hope to get to meet him next month in San Jose. He just didn't look at all like I expected him to! I wasn't disparaging him, merely making an observation.

I'm completely confused as to where the thought that I was speaking poorly of them came from. It was NOT my intention for my post to be taken that way.

I am flabbergasted right now....

:-(

OK, so who else did we meet at Monk's Party?

We spent a good deal of time chatting with Rod & Clair (sp?). I don't know if they have a blog or not, but they sure were nice people!

Of course we met Matisse. It's kind of funny; I saw her in her red catsuit when we got there & thought I recognized her from her pictures. I went up to her and asked, "Are you Matisse?" She mis-heard me and sort of warily (almost suspiciously) answered, "I am a mistress, yes." Realizing that she hadn't heard what I really said, I smiled and said, "No, I said 'Are you Matisse?'". She relaxed and said "Yes", so then I introduced myself & Dangly as well as our friends. She was playing Assistant Host, so she didn't have a lot of time to chat, just snippets of conversation here and there through the night.

We met Rossi in her stunning blue catsuit, who pointed out her partner to us, but she was a bit busy being tied up so I don't think she noticed.

NerdyGirl was a sweetie! She's so cute & seems like she'd just be a real bundle of energy to hang around with. When I introduced myelf, she profusely thanked me for sending up some special soap in the Care Package I sent during the Deathmarch (I also sent some dark chocolate-covered espresso beans with a note saying "Fuck the cookies, here's some caffeine!").

We didn't get personally introduced, but Matisse did point Max out to us - he was pretty busy the whole evening tieing people up, not surprisingly. I made the comment, "I expected him to be taller!" Seriously, if you saw Max on the street, you would not guess that he was an "Evil Rope Top". I don't mean to offend, but frankly he looks more like an accountant - not at all what I was expecting based upon his picture! Dangly & I are hoping to get down to Folsom Fringe next month & take Max's "Bondage for Sex" class, so hopefully we'll get introduced to him then. Hmmm, I wonder if he needs a stunt bottom?

Of course, Tambo was incredible. Her dress was awesome - I can't even begin to describe it, so I hope she posts pictures of it (hint, hint). She is simply beautiful and carries herself with such regal authority. Truly a sight to behold. Monk is one lucky man!

I'm sure I'm forgetting to mention someone that we met that night - and I'm equally sure I'll remember them right after I turn off my computer tonight. :-(

By now you've probably read on other peoples' blogs about the House of Gord stuff & the Fucking Machines. I watched Gord's "Bitch Bender" demo and was amazed that anyone could actually take 800+ pounds of pressure, but she did & she enjoyed it! BTW, Gord has a yummy accent and looks VERY nice in breeches. I didn't get a chance to try out the Fucking Machines - simply because I was on my period. If my pussy had been available, I'd've been on it because I've been insanely curious about how those things feel ever since I first saw a picture of one!

I promised in Part One that I'd tell you who I thought had the "best body" at the party. Of course, it's completely subjective, but I think the girl who did the House of Gord demos came pretty close to having The Perfect Body. She had beautiful long curly hair, lovely legs, a small waist which curved delightfully into full hips that nicely balanced her large breasts (real, I think).

However, this wasn't a contest & notwithstanding the House of Gord Demo Girl (I didn't catch her name! [UPDATE: Max tells me her name is Astra - thanks, Max!]), I actually ended the evening feeling much better about my own body. I guess I was kind of expecting everybody there to be perfect 10s, but they turned out to be just a bunch of normal-looking people (well, as normal as one can look in fetish gear!). I wasn't the thinnest (and certainly not the fittest) person there, but I "held my own" as far as body shape goes. I guess I'm still working through some body image issues after losing all that weight last year, huh?

Back when we got the invitation to the Abbey party, I sent Monk an email asking if he would suspend me - my first suspension. He replied saying that he'd be happy to. So when we got to the party, I reminded him of that & he lightly trailed his finger across my exposed belly and said, "Patience, child; wait your turn" then walked away. Argh! Later on I reminded him, "You know that patience is not one of my virtues" to which he just raised an eyebrow and gave me The Look - you know, the one that says "You know you shouldn't have told me that, don't you?" heavy sigh

I know I drooled about Griffin in Part One, but perhaps an indicator of how taken I was by him is this: I offered to let him tie me up. As I mentioned before, my Baseline Rule was that only Monk & Dangly could do that, but Griffin made such a positive impression on me that I thought it'd be fun to let him tie me up, too (and besides I was getting impatient waiting for Monk!). He replied, "I'd love to! But of course, I have to check with Liss first." "Of course" I said. Just then, we noticed that Liss was trying out one of the House of Gord demo machines, so Griffin went over to watch that. Almost immediately after that, Monk finished tying Kitten up & it was finally my turn!

I think I'll wrap this installment up here. I should have time to write about my first suspension tomorrow.

This post is so long, I'm going to have to break it up into installments. Here is Part One:

Oh, sheesh! Where to begin? There's so much to talk about; so much to tell! I suppose Maria von Trapp had the right idea - [singing] Let's start at the very beginning; a very good place to start! [/singing]....

Ahem... ANYWAY!

Dangly took Friday off of work & we got up in the morning, did our usual morning clean-up rituals & hopped in the car. I had packed up a bunch of food the night before while Dangly packed our clothes. We even had a little checklist by the door to make sure we took everything we needed (this becomes important later). We were happy to find that we managed to get out of the Bay Area in only an hour & a half - which is remarkable considering that we left our place at 8:30am, smack in the middle of the morning Rush Hour. We must have done a "reverse commute" the whole way - it's the only explanation.

We drove... and drove... and drove.... I-5 through California is not really all that interesting, you know? Once you get into Oregon, you hit the mountains & the scenery is nice, but before that, the best thing is Mount Shasta. Dangly drove up to the Oregon border & then I took over for a while. I do like to drive through the mountains - the twisty turny roads are fun! We stopped a few times for potty breaks & food breaks - you know, the standard travelling stuff.

About 9pm, Dangly is driving, we've just crossed over into Washington State & Dangly turns to look in the back seat. "Oh shit!" he says. "What?" I ask, slightly panicked at the tone in his voice, wondering if something was wrong with the car. "Do you know what we forgot?" he finally asked. "Um, no." "We forgot to bring the hanging clothes!"

Oops!

That means that we lef ALL of Dangly's outfits at home - he hadn't quite decided what to wear yet, so he was planning to bring about 3 different sets of clothing, all on hangers in the closet, despite the fact that it was plain as day on our checklist!

Fortunately, we did manage to bring his underclothes - a good thing considering we had just gone shopping on Thursday night to Frederick's of Hollywood to buy him a really nice rose-colored corset (with matching thong) and to Macy's to buy him a nice pink lacy sort-of-corset-thingy (with boning, but no lacing).

We laughed about it because what else were we going to do? We couldn't very well turn around and go back! Not after almost 13 hours on the road! So we carried on.

We had made arrangements to stay with a friend of ours - and got to meet his fiancée for the first time. Such a sweetie! They accompanied us to the party, btw, and seemed to have a good time. That's a good thing, because I wasn't too sure how they'd react to all that stuff - but it turns out I worried over nothing as they both read this blog & have started their own.

We arrived at our friend's house at about 11pm or so, unloaded the car & just generally unwound from the long trip. We made plans for the next day - shopping for clothes for Dangly, plus miscellaneous other things - then headed off to bed.

[aside]
Now let me back up a minute here & mention that I started my period last Thursday. I will provide more details in a subsequent post (I still have to post about last week's date with F, too!), but suffice to say that driving for 15 hours while having menstrual cramps is NOT the most fun thing in the world! However, it seems that by Saturday morning, my period had settled down to the point where I was no longer concerned about leaking out of my Keeper at the party.
[/aside]

The next morning, our friends (Brutus & Porcia) took us out for breakfast, which just happened to be at a restaurant in a part of town close to a couple of fetish clothing shops. So, after breakfast, we headed over to Hot Topic where Dangly bought himself a pair of silver ear-rings (since I had put the kibosh on him wearing any he already owned - I didn't think any of them were stylish enough!) and Porcia tried on a few things, but I don't think she bought anything there. For myself, I bought one of those fake appliqué tattoo thingies for $2.00.

We then headed over to Metro, a place that does body piercing & also has some really nice (and really expensive) fetish wear. There were lots of nice things there that I really would have loved to buy, but I really can't see spending that much money on at this time. :-( Maybe someday.

Anyway, Porcia tried on some more clothes & found a couple of really cute skirts and corset-style tops. Brutus found a shirt to go with his Utilikilt.

After that, we drove over to a mall where there was a Tall Girl shop. Being 6-foot-1, Dangly has to shop at places that cater to tall women if he wants to find anything in his size. While there we found him a lovely pleated black skirt & sheer white frilly blouse - both on sale! Score! I was really glad we found them in his size since they were on "clearance" and that usually means really slim pickin's!

Back to our friends' place where we napped a bit before getting ready for the party. As usual, Dangly took the longest to get ready. I say "as usual" because it really had nothing to do with the fact that he was going en femme - even though that did take longer - but because it *always* takes him longer to get ready than it takes me! Porcia did Dangly's hair & I did his make-up, then we both laced him into his corset together. FINALLY, we were all ready to go!

We drove down to the Abbey and parked. We knew we were in the right place when we saw several leather-clad people going into the building. I offered to let Dangly out on the nice smooth sidewalk so he wouldn't have to walk over gravel in his high heels, but I needn't have bothered - he walks better in those damn heels than most women I see! (and the heels make his legs look *wonderful*!)

Anyway, we checked in at the door & bought some raffle tickets, then headed into the deep dark recesses of the Abbey proper.

Grabbing some food & drink from the refreshment table, we introduced ourselves to some people & started chatting. I was especially taken by Silk - a self-described "Smart Ass Masochist" who has a beautiful smile & wonderful laugh (and really long nails - more about those later). Silk introduced me to a lovely corsetted lady with beautiful long curly hair. We said "hi" and she turned to talk to some other people. That's when her name punched a few buttons in my brain. Tapping her on my shoulder I asked, "Is that as in LissAdventures?" "Yes," she answered. I smiled and said, "I'm TwiddlyBits!" Her face broke into one of the most gorgeous smiles I've ever seen and she said, "TwiddlyBits!" Pointing at Dangly she said, "So this must be DanglyBits!" We all shook hands again & she promised to introduce us to Griffin as soon as he could be found.

Liss really is much more beautiful than I expected. Of course, I've only ever seen the pics she's posted on her blog, which (I know from my own pics) don't even begin to touch the surface. Her hair is simply wonderful - the kind of hair I've always wanted - and her smile lights up her face in the most beautiful way! She's also shorter than I imagined. :-)

Soon Griffin was found and we were introduced. He, too, seemed genuinely happy to meet us. And let me tell you, I was happy to meet him! OMG, he is GORGEOUS!

Excuse me while I go drool! Liss - I hope you don't mind because I'm going to spend a few sentences, er I mean *paragraphs*, lusting after Griffin!

There's not a specific "type" of man that I've ever been involved with. If you look at all the relationships I've had over the years, I've been with short guys, tall guys, fair guys, dark guys, engineers, artists, musicians - a real eclectic mix. Physical looks are not the Number One thing I look for in a relationship; it's the personality that clicks for me.

However, if you ask me what physical type of man I'm most attracted to, I'd have to say that there are two types I like the most. One is tall and slender - like Dangly - and the other is about my height with long-ish thick hair, which describes Griffin.

He has the type of hair that makes you want to run your fingers through it & see it spread out on the pillow as you ride him, or hanging in his face as he looks down at you. He has eyes that twinkle in a deliciously naughty way set in a face that seems always ready to grin at a moment's notice. This man seriously made my knees weak! I'm starting to squirm a bit here in my chair just thinking about him now! :-)

I had the opportunity to chat with him a few times over the course of the evening & the icing on the cake (or maybe it's the cake itself & everything else is the icing) is that he's a truly intelligent, sensitive and interesting person! I wish I had had longer to just get to know him better (and Liss!! Let's not forget her! She's just as interesting and intelligent & I'm totally smitten by her, too!).

Oh, and Griffin if you're reading this, let me ask: "Umberto, he does not stab at her with his sword?"

Fast forward a moment to after we got home last night. I asked Dangly who he thought had the best body at the party (I'll tell you my vote in another post). He replied, "I was mainly looking at clothing, not bodies." "OK, so who do you think had the best clothes?" I asked. He thought about it a moment and said, "Liss & Griffin. She looked really nice in her somewhat tight-laced corset and heels, and Griffin looked *great* in his white long-sleeved shirt with corset-vest & black pants." "He did, indeed, didn't he?" I swooned.

I'm afraid that I may have come across as Somewhat Reserved to them. You see, I was a bit nervous. Dangly & I are new to this whole BDSM community & I don't know what the etiquette is yet. I'm a very "touchy feely" person; I *like* to touch and to be touched, but I don't know what the Rules are at this sort of function. The result is that I felt a bit off my stride, not knowing if I could reach out a hand to touch someone's arm or shoulder while talking to them or not. :-(

Anyway, this post is long enough for now. There's so much more to tell! I hope to have time to post Part Two tomorrow. Until then, you can read the write-up at Brutus & Porcia's new blog.

I just wanted to post a quick note saying that YES I will post about the Abbey Party this past weekend, but am tremendously busy right now trying to catch up after being out of town. Patience, my darlings!